Saturday, August 14, 2010

The day the whole world changed: Speranza

So there was I pecking about at the ground when one of the other single ladies started to squak about.  So I looked at Lady Lavery and she was drinking and the Countess was pecking about aswell. so who the f%*$ was squaking??????

I looked around and outside was a hen looking in at me, what was a hen doing outside our single ladies house at the bottom of the garden?

I gave the other two a kick and then looked out and seemed as perplexed as me. What was happening, why were there hens in OUR garden.???

Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Comment from "Herself the Mammy"

All the single ladies have now been renamed "The slug conversion production team".  They seem to love the slugs and run to get out each evening.

Anyway, come back tomorow to fing out what happens "The day the whole world changed"

Profile: Picasso

Hi all, I’m a cat, I’m 5 years old and the first cat of the house. My owner is “She who doesn’t live here”. Yep, strange I know but she does come to visit me. I sleep some of the day and hunt at night. Sometimes I play with Simba but keep well away from Socrates. I love hunting rats and mice and pigeons and rabbits. I have plenty here to keep me going. “Herself the Mammy” got hens, they are normally something I would like to chase, but as she owns them and I know what side my bread is buttered on I will leave well alone. Also, it’s good for her to have something of her own to look after rather than care for other people and their pets like she does.

Day 13: Simba

I have a new job, I’m now third in command of the hen herding team. My job is to call if one gets away and let “Miss Skinny Long Legs” know where she is. And best of all I get paid in hugs.

Day 13: Lady Lavery

Well the evening outing has become a daily event now, we get out every evening for an hour to eat slugs and the get shooed back in for the evening. I can walk around with my head held high looking at the scenery and hissing at Socrates. When I want a slug I just wait for Speranza to find one and then take it from her.

Day 11: Countess Markievicz

I don’t believe it, I tried and tried and tried not to but today I laid an egg, it must have been all those slugs I ate. It just better not become a habit, once in a while is fine but not very day.

Day 10: Countess Markievicz

Finally, something new today.

We got out, well we were let out. “Herself the Mammy” and “Miss Skinny Long Legs” opened the door and out we got to explore the garden. Well, the other two were a little unsure do they followed me around the sand pile and into the long grass by the stream. We found LOTS of slugs, slugs and more slugs. It didn’t take me long to decide to eat as many as possible and I started to gulp them down. After watching me the other two single ladies decided to join me and tried a few. Then Lady Lavery got lazy and decided to let Speranza peck for them and then she would just pull them out of her beak, so funny to watch Speranza try to run and eat at the same time. After an hour we got shooed into our coop again, but it was getting dark and we were tired so didn’t complain.

Day 8: Sperenza

Same old, same old. Myself and Lady Lavery have a routine now of laying an egg every day, then going out for a scratch. The Countess doesn’t do much really.

Profile: Simba

Simba drinking water from a seed tray
Hello everyone, I’m a little cat, a little cute cat that is. I was a boy but then they took me to the vet and when I got back I wasn’t a boy any more, just an it. My mammy is “Miss Skinny long legs” and she’s really nice to me. She hugs me, and lets me sneak into the house when “The man who shouts” isn’t around and gives me treats. I like sleeping, and hugs and chasing butterflies and birds. Last week I thought we were getting a new house in the garden. The “Boy with tattoos” was building something and it looked like a new house for me to play in, I kept jumping in a jumping out. But then these three funny 3 new things arrived in it and “Herself the Mammy” keeps going out and feeding them a talking to them. Though she built herself a new bench to sit on and I sneak over to her and curl up with her. They look like the pigeons I try to catch but they are much bigger and don’t seem to fly. The must be nice though cos they are orange ...just like me!!!!

Day 5: Lady Lavery

Well the novelty of being here has worn off now. I’ve settled down into a routine, of waking up, going for a drink of water and a peck of food and then popping into nest box to lay an egg. I’m beginning to feel like “been there, done that, what’s next” .

Comment from “Herself the Mammy”

Well the first egg was the best tasting egg I have ever had. For some reason I thought something would be wrong with it so I was afraid to boil it, I cracked it into a bowl and it looked perfect so I went ahead and fried it and had it on toast.....yummy, well worth getting hens for . We got two more eggs today and “The man who shouts” had them for breakfast, and even he approved. “Miss skinny long legs want one now, which is unusual cos she doesn’t actually like eggs. The cats can’t figure out what the hens are or what they are doing.

Profile: Socrates

Socky asleep on the table
Called Socrates but I go by the name of Socky normally. I am owned by “The man who shouts” but fed by “Herself the Mammy” (as are all animals and humans here). I’m a black cat with two white socks, I like sleeping on a cushion or a table and will eat anything I can find. I can catch mice and rats (baby ones) and like to play in the woods with our neighbour and my cat friend Clarissa. I also don’t like Picasso so beat up on him as often as I can.

Day 3: Speranza

We meet a new person today “The man who shouts”. He came out, had a good look at us and then started to shout about his lawn been scratched up. Well he needn’t shout at me, I don’t scratch at all, it’s those two aristocratic hens I live with. Anyway, I had better things to do, guess what else lives in the garden with us, CATS. Would you believe it they have 3 cats. Well one belongs to “The man who shouts”, one belongs to “Miss skinny long legs” and one to “She who doesn’t live here”. Two of them just keep pacing outside “All the single ladies house” looking like they want to come in, listen guys , doesn’t the name give it away!!!!!

Day 3: Countess Markievicz

Well they had a good aul race today, both of the rushing to a nest box and laid an egg at the same time. I don’t know why they bother cos “Herself the Mammy” is watching and rushes out to get them straight away. We got some potatoes and rice today along with those stupid oats, it HAS to improve at some stage. I have all the area we have dug up now and scratched through. I will need to get out soon and do some more digging, but without the correct food I won’t have the energy.

Thursday, July 29, 2010

Day 2: Countess Markievicz

Honestly, those two idiots are off already trying to outdo each other in the egg laying stakes.  Don't they realise how much energy that takes.  I'm going to try to not lay anything, sit in the box every now and then and cluck and hope Herself the Mammy doesn't spot that I haven't laid anything.

I hope the food improves though, I'm making a stand and not eating those oats.

The wine box nesting boxes, just the touch of class I eggspect

Day 2: Lady Lavery

Still here in our new place.  Anyway, just to annoy that Speranza I spent all morning sitting in the nest box clucking like mad and an hour later out popped an egg. Then the stupid stuck up git, popped into the box after me and laid an egg herself, aaaaargh.

Comment from "Herself the Mammy"

FINALLY got hens.  I went out at lunchtime and when I got back I found an egg, I mean I know the idea was to get eggs but just looking at that first one was like magic.  I don't even want to eat it, I'm afraid I won't get any more or that something will be wrong with it.

Profile: Lady Lavery

Eggsellent laying hen, the first of all three to manage it.
Likes to feel superior but is intimidated by Speranza.
Loves a good scratch in the dust.

Profile: Countess Markievicz

Well I'm a hen obviously, of royal blood and used the the good things in life.
I have some little quirky things, like a crooked beak and a desire to scratch and dig.
My favourite food is slugs.

Three hens, Sperenza, Countess Markievicz and Lady Lavery

Day one: Lady Lavery

Trust me to end up with those two, Speranza the bully with the ostentasious comb and that snobby Countess who has a crooked beak.  Anyway, I got one up on all of them, I knew I would, I knew it would be me and they wouldn't belive me.  So, guess what I did....yep, its was me, the VERY FIRST EGG came from me.  We got to our new house at 1pm and at 3pm I laid an egg.  That really upset those two.  Anyway, it has me worn out and I'm off to bed for the night.

Day one: Countess Markievicz

Honestly, that Speranza, all she does is complain and try to bully people.  Never sees the good side of things or accepts life as an adventure.  So today myself, Speranza and Lady Lavery arrived in the garden of "Herself the Mammy" and set about living in our new quarters "All the single ladies" house at the back of the garden.  Now, as my name suggests I'm an aristocrat and expect to be treated royally.  Accommodation to date had been very lowly but this new place is OK.  It could do with some extending in the future but for now it's fine.

All the single ladies house at the
 back of the garden

So we were hooshed into this new accommodation and my first impression was well they have some taste, our nest boxes were vintage wine crates, very fancy.  We had water available and some food. I must say the food is what let it down, rolled oats.  We have been eating layers pellets and well plain old oats just don't do it for me.  I heard "Herself the Mammy" say it was because the layers pellets had GM soya, well guess what, it's not you that's eating it, its us.  Later on though we got some bread and a head of lettuce, that was good so I set about a plan whereby none of us would eat the oats thus forcing "Herself the Mammy" to provide us with something better. Will have to wait and see if that works.

Profile: Speranza

Speranza, the lady boss with red comb
Hen, hyrbid for laying.

Brown in colour.

I'm the really pretty one so it's easy to pick me out.
I have a red comb that is larger than all the others and I'm happy to flaunt it about.
I'm also more intelligent and have voted myself as the leader of the ladies.

Day one: Speranza

Well it was a really strange day today.  Some days are strange but this one was really strange.  I'm a hen, I used to be a chicken, and before that an egg so I'm told but I don't remember that. Anyway as a hen one day is the same as the next.  We have a big barn to mooch around in, about 400 of us I guess.  Sisters, all the same age.  Anyway, we have food and water and spend the day just hanging out. Until this morning that was.  'Him with the food' arrived in a grabbed about 100 of us and put us into these plastic crates. There was 8 of us in a box and luckily I was with some of my friends.  Then we were lifted into a van and driven for about 30 minutes.  When the van stopped 'Him with the food' opened it, fresh air came in and I looked out and saw people staring in at us.  They handed 'Him with the food' boxes and well I can't believe what happened next. He shoved his hand into the crate and grabbed some of my sisters put them into the boxes and handed them off to the people. 

Can you believe it, he was giving us away, splitting us up and giving us away.

I was terrified, our crate was near the front, close the door I urged him but no he didn't, he kept grabbing hens and putting them into boxes and passing them out to others.  The inevitable happened, our crate was next.  I seen someone looking at me, someone I now know as 'Herself the Mammy' and next I know me and two of my sisters  (nice ones luckily, and two that will do what I tell them to do) were grabbed and put into a cat box.  She took us off, put us into the back of a van and drove off with us.

Well, a strange day it was and the beginning of a new life for the three of us.